Trusting God Today

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

I wrote last week of the unreasonable fear I felt about going to see the eye doctor. There is reason for concern, but I knew going in that I was not likely to learn anything from that first visit. And so it was.

I’ve been having episodes of fuzzy (more so than is normal for me) vision that vary in severity and length of time. I knew that the doctor was not likely to be able to diagnose anything from looking at my eyes and would probably schedule an MRI. I put off doing anything, fearing the cost of the scan based on the nature of my healthcare coverage. I remain unemployed as of this writing. That turned out to be another groundless fear that could likely have been allayed with a little research. The result of the visit was as I expected, and I had the MRI today.

Whatever was learned today will not be shared with me until my appointment with the doctor on Thursday, so there was no reason for anxiety. I felt none directly related to the event, but I will not deny having some trepidation concerning the results. What is going on? What does it mean? Will I lose the vision I have? Is something worse happening? What if I’m no longer able to care for Linda?

I already have many of the skills employed by those who are completely blind, but it would still require some adaptation. The unpredictability is disconcerting. I would get used to the change if it were constant, but having it come and go is disorienting. I used to love to go out for walks. I haven’t been in a while because having it happen when I’m out navigating the streets is a little frightening. I hate to admit that. I’ve always been the one telling folks to get out and live life. There is risk in everything. Maybe this serves to humble me. Sometimes the line between healthy confidence and dangerous pride can get blurred. I must remember that everything I have is given to me by God, and His is the glory.

I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. I am reminded of the words of Jesus, “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matthew 6:34) He said this after exhorting His hearers to seek God’s kingdom first and the righteousness of God. All the things we need will be given to us if we do that. The only trouble is, we usually have different ideas about what we need than He does.

This is the point at which we must choose to trust Him. I know that I belong to Him. I know that He will work all things together for my good. It does me no good to fret over what may be. In fact, it does me harm. I can and should plan for the future, but always with the knowledge that the future belongs to God. I can’t be focused on His kingdom and his righteousness if I’m focused on my fears.

Imaginary Monsters

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

I do not remember being afraid of monsters in the closet, but I do remember nightmares full of strange and frightening sensations that would drive me from my room to seek the comfort of my parents. I was not exposed to scary stories at that age, but my mind supplied the scare anyway. We grow to understand that our childish fears are unreasonable, but that doesn’t stop our imaginations from generating new monsters. Sometimes they grow out of real threats. At other times, they are just as insubstantial as the ones hiding in our closets when we were kids. I fought one of them yesterday.

I have been experiencing some troubling symptoms that affect my vision. Upon sharing them with my doctor, he referred me to a neuro-ophthalmologist. I pushed aside my misgivings and set up an appointment, but as I reviewed the new patient information and filled out the forms, the anxiety began to build.

I have become somewhat mistrustful of doctors over the years. I believe most mean to do good, but I have come to doubt that they really know how to do good in many cases. This one still insists on mask wearing, which makes me doubt him more. My eye condition requires some patience on the part of the physician and staff, as I can’t always reliably get my eyes to do what they are asking. Eye exams are stressful for me and everyone working with me. As my condition is not likely to change and there is little or nothing to be done for it, I usually avoid them. On top of it all, the potential causes of the symptoms I have been experiencing include some scary possibilities.

So, after a night plagued with bad dreams, I got off to a rough start, arriving late for my appointment. That didn’t help my state of mind. The stress caused the symptoms to make an appearance. As I sat in the exam room waiting for the doctor, I reflected on what I was feeling. I knew that my response to the circumstance was out of proportion to its gravity. I know that my Lord is in control and will bring good from whatever comes next. I began to softly sing an old tune created from Psalm 27:1 in the King James version, “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?” From that point, I began to get control of my anxiety. The examination was not so bad. The doctor immediately understood what I was telling him, and we ended up where I thought we would. More information is needed, so the next step is an MRI.

I created one of those imaginary monsters. There was absolutely no reason to fear. I knew going in that it was unlikely that I would receive an answer that day. I didn’t even need to be concerned with what I might learn. So, my heavenly Father came in, turned on the light, opened the closet, and showed me there was nothing in there but all my junk.

I don’t imagine there will be good news forthcoming next week unless God steps in and fixes something. I’m certainly asking. I do know that I have seen Him bring good from our circumstances time and time again. Whatever comes next, I know where my help comes from. My help comes from Yahweh! (Psalm 121)

Fishing Lessons

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

We’ve all heard the old proverb, “Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach him to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.”  It comes up any time we talk about the best ways to help the poor. Let’s add some new dimensions to the basic problem.  What if the man is blind.  Do you give him the fish?  I fished once in my life and didn’t particularly enjoy it, but it seems to me there are no major obstacles to a blind man fishing.  As long as he learns a safe way to bate the hook and has a safe place to cast from he should be able to fish.  What if a man has no arms?  Do you give him the fish, or can he find a way to fish with his feet?  I bet this family could do it.  What if he has no legs either?  We’re running out of options, but this fellow might have some ideas.

My point is this.  Though there are many programs out there aimed at helping people with disabilities find work, there is still a prevailing assumption that disability is…well…disabling.  It would be ludicrous to say that there is no point at which a person is too handicapped to do any productive work, but I wonder Whether if we tried, we might find even a little something to help many of them find a meaningful application for whatever abilities they retain.

Why should it be that I, being reasonably intelligent and capable, could in the absence of income from my job apply for and receive public assistance for life just because I am blind?  People rightly object to perfectly able-bodied individuals living off the backs of those who earn a living.  I would be no different than they are.  I have been an SSI recipient.  SSI is a form of social security available to those with disabilities and no other source of income.  Though there are programs in place to help someone wanting to work, the easy path would have been simply to take the check and any other public assistance available to me and spend my days as a loaf.  It’s the worst form of self-perpetuating welfare.  That’s not the way I was raised.  I took it as a hand up, not a handout.

Nevertheless, it still embarrasses me that I took it at all.  I consoled myself with the fact that I would give it all back in short order after entering the workforce and that my family would have had it to share with me if the government hadn’t taken it from them in taxes.  Simply handing out money and benefits without any expectation is destructive whomever the object of such generosity may be.  Taking it away from someone else to do so is nothing but glorified theft.

I do not suggest that all such programs be immediately abolished.  We need to find a compassionate way to gradually shift away from government sponsorship to agencies that will demand accountability and produce long-term positive results.  The government needs to get out of the picture entirely, it has no constitutional authority to be there.  Better heads than mine are needed to come up with details, but we all know we cannot afford to keep going the way we are.

Finally, societal attitudes need to change, and this is the hardest part.  I don’t believe any human agency is capable of affecting that kind of change.  We consider ourselves compassionate people, but only so long as we don’t have to show it in person.  Let the government do that.  The problem is that the government can’t.  It was never meant to.  We are meant to do that as individuals.  We’ve now raised generations of people who look to government instead of God and who believe they have a right to anything they want.  If we can’t change this our nation is doomed.  We can’t, but God can, if we will turn to Him.  This is why our churches need to be involved first in preaching the Gospel and second in practical ways of meeting needs that result in improvement and dignity for those we help.

The question we need to be asking is “what can you do?”  We can start from there.  People will always need our help.  I will always need help in some areas.  So will you for that matter, whether you face any kind of disability or not.  The objective should be to build from the inside out.  Allow each person to contribute whatever they are able.  We have had people in our church who could do little more than offer a smile, but that is not without worth.  They could not make themselves understood by those around them, but God can understand them perfectly and they can pray.  I still don’t know exactly what it looks like, but I know that ideas like that form the foundation of what Linda and I are trying to accomplish.  We want everyone to learn to fish, or to help in whatever way they are able.

How I Became an Ever Trumper

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

I’ve been mining this blog for material that I can use in my new project, Accessible Success. I ran across a post from 2016 in which I had some unkind things to say about then candidate Donald Trump. I want to minimize political opinion on the new blog to preserve its redemptive purposes, so I’m following up here.

You might have called me a never Trumper back then, though not so much that I would vote for Clinton. I almost cried when it became evident that he would be the Republican nominee. It seemed to me we had completely lost our way. Then, he won, and I was pleasantly surprised by his actions once in office. He actually did the things he said he would do with few exceptions and those not for lack of trying.

I do think he made some serious mistakes when it came to addressing the pandemic, and I wish he had the humility to admit it. I think they will come back to haunt him in this election cycle. Watch for some of the people who have been all in on the vaccines to change their tune when they sense it might be a point of vulnerability for him.

I find his public persona distasteful and wish he would show a little more grace, but I think he may well be the best candidate to help pull us back from the brink of destruction. In a second term, he has nothing to lose and can afford to aggressively drain the swamp. I think he will, provided our country remains intact enough to hold elections in November and that those elections are at least mostly fair. I may have to eat my words again. Time will tell.

One thing I said before has not changed. Our only hope is to return to God. There is only one messiah, and His name is Jesus. Without a spiritual revival, we will not survive. The only question is how long our destruction will take.

The Journey Continues

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

For those of you who follow Accessible Success, you’ve already seen a version of this. It seemed fitting to add it here as well.

I am not sure how to write this, but it seems to me worthwhile to expand on what I have written in the book in a way that reveals the ongoing struggles that come with life on this earth and the strength to endure that comes from our Lord. I have written of success as something defined by Him and not by us. I am determined that His view is the only one that matters to me. We all know that’s easy to say and hard to live.

I finished the book just as I began a new job. It had been my hope that I might use the free time granted me by the severance package I had from my previous employer to build up the church, and maybe start a new career, but I had no clear vision of what that looked like. When the end of the severance payments drew near, I fell back on what I knew and took a job as a contract programmer. I had a peace about it. Our tithes are a significant part of the churches income. The best thing I could do for the church at that time was to return to work and keep the money flowing.

The past month has brought new challenges. My wife, Linda, had a fall, cut her head, and ended up in a rehab hospital. Her care has become increasingly difficult, and I knew we could not keep going as we were. This incident forced the issue. She’s back home now, and we are trying to figure out how to adapt to a new reality and wondering how long until it changes again. My last contract ended, and the bills are starting to arrive.

She came home last Friday. She has not been able to attend church in person for some time, but we broadcast our messages through Facebook. She calls another member who feels that she cannot attend and they watch together. As long as I am not gone for more than a few hours, she has been fine by herself. However, that was not the case last Sunday, so soon after being discharged. We were planning on doing things as normal, but as it became apparent that she would not be alright left alone, I called off the service and stayed home with her. During the “pandemic”, we briefly did everything remotely, but I had just canceled my Zoom subscription to save money.

The week before, our treasurer informed the church that we were spending more than we take in, a situation we have not faced in decades. Due to her careful management, we are not in immediate peril, but it is a strong signal that things need to change if we are to keep the doors open.

In the past few weeks, I have paced the floor, prayed and cried. The emotions overtake me without warning, sometimes with no apparent provocation. Who am I to write about success? I seem to be failing at everything that matters to me, and as I understand it, to God. I grieve the suffering of my beloved, and I don’t see how this gets better. There is not one person in our congregation that isn’t suffering from something, and I grieve for them as well.

Yet in the middle of all of this, Holy Spirit speaks to me, and tears come to my eyes again as I reflect on His goodness. Everything that He has taught me remains true. If I look to myself, I am guaranteed to fail. If I look to Father, His strength will be shown in my weakness. I believe what He said. I know that He is doing a greater work than I can see from here. I know that I can trust Him. My success is still accessible, because it is in His hands, not mine.

In conclusion, I would like to share with you the message that I delivered to the church last time we met. It is part of a series on the book of John, but it has particular relevance to the things I have been speaking of here. It won’t be the most eloquent thing you ever heard, but it is a powerful illustration of the truth. I hope it will bless you as I was blessed in its preparation.

The Truth Will Make You Free

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

The truth in this case is that I should probably just cancel this podcast, since I have not added content in so long that now the site is throwing errors. At least i think that’s why it’s happening. But, I’m not quite ready to let go. So, here’s something I shared with the church last Sunday that is worth repeating.

Picture of Larry with the words, "Lion's Roar" and "podcast and Blog" above and below the picture respectively.
The Lion's Roar
The Truth Will Make You Free
Loading
/

My First Book, Accessible Success, Was Published in March

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

Yes, I’m just now getting around to posting about it here. I’ve been all over social media with it. That’s partly because I’m too busy to blog, and if I can make the time, I am focused on promoting the book. Whether it makes sense to continue keeping this one up or not I haven’t decided, especially given the lack of attention I already pay to it. However, not everything I might want to opine about will be appropriate to the new site, so maybe I will keep this one around. Check it out and find links to purchase the book at accessiblesuccess.com.

I said, “my first book.” Does that mean there will be others? Honestly, i don’t know, but if this one was to do well, I do have some ideas. I felt that the Lord wanted me to write this one. Time will tell if He will permit me another.

Early Treatment Protocol

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

This is a long interview, but worth the time. It covers a lot of ground.

https://covid19.onedaymd.com/2021/12/dr-peter-mccullough-fact-check-and.html

Dr Peter McCullough an internist, cardiologist, epidemiologist, and a full professor of medicine at Texas A&M College of Medicine in Dallas. His approach is to try to avoid hospitalization, using the precautionary principle.  

Fakts from a Fisitionn

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

The terrible spelling above is intentional so that you might get to read this.

www.americanthinker.com/articles/2021/12/the_covid_scam_the_progressive_path_to_power_and_tyranny.html

Probably Missing Context

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

In the past I have been much more skeptical of pieces like this.  Big business bashing seemed to be a distraction for the discontent, and things are never that simple.  The last couple of years have convinced me that at least sometimes the critics are correct.  It does seem these days that they are more often correct than not.  Are there details behind these incidents that would change our understanding of what happened?  It could be.  Are there outright lies here?  It could be.  Is it all exactly what it appears to be?  It could be.  It’s enough to make me think twice before putting anything this company produces into my body.

How did Pfizer manage to rebrand itself as the savior of humanity?

Source: Pfizer’s History of Fraud, Corruption, and Using Nigerian Children as ‘Human Guinea Pigs’